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Healthy Relationships Start with a Choice. If a healthy relationship is what you desire, you must first choose to build one! below are 9 tips that are sure to start you on your way:

1.   Make Good Memories Good memories are like a bank account full of money. When you have them, they serve as a reserve for times when you have more withdrawals than deposits. Spend time together doing things that support quality time, mutual desires, laughter, togetherness, and exploration. With great memories to fall back on, it’s really hard to go bankrupt or have a negative balance in your relational account. Make time for each other and don’t let complex expectations cloud the reality that some of the greatest memories are simple and even free.

2.   Make Love Your Aim… Healthy relationships have the ability to forgive, compromise, sacrifice, and continue to grow all because of a little four-letter word – Love. Here’s a challenge, try a little more tenderness, acceptance, admiration, gratitude, positivity, and unconditional regard in your approach to your partner and watch it work as a healthy relationship fertilizer. Love gives every relationship the greatest opportunity to thrive. It’s the key to seeing the bright side, the glass half full, and the difficult times being worth it. Love for yourself and your partner will promote growth, optimism, and longevity that can pass the tests of time.

Respect and Follow the Rules… At every theme park you will witness regulation signs that read: “You must be this tall to ride” or “the maximum weight limit is… ”, all to ensure your safety. Naturally, if you don’t follow the criteria, you increase the probability of experiencing a hazard to yourself and others. In comparison, relationships also have boundaries that minimize problems and need to be regarded. What rules of engagement or boundaries will you use to navigate critical areas like money, family, sex, gender roles, and parenting? Being clear will help you align your actions and decisions so you won’t endanger, disrespect, or sabotage the relationship.

4.   Build on the Truth Dishonesty and deception are like a sinkhole to a relationship. At best, they threaten to erode the sturdiness of its foundation. At worst, its toxic nature can destroy the relationship. Honesty on the other hand, may not always be your easiest choice but it is your best choice. Together, it offers a sense of safety and security while helping to move forward with everything being put on the table. Healthy relationships afford for acceptance vs. being judgmental. If you can let the person know who you are, you can be assured that they are in a relationship with you versus a false or limited image of you. When you’re honest and accept honesty as a term of your relationship, you give each other the best opportunity to move authentically as a team for the long haul.

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Related: J. Cole Wishes More Artists Will Go To Ferguson

Relationship Doctor On Call: Healthy Relationships, Luck “or” Choice?  was originally published on elev8.com

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